Ugly on the Inside
“Freckles are angel kisses, that’s why you don’t have very many. The angels don’t love you as much as they love me,” she sneered. She stood with her hands clenched in fists on her hips, her platinum hair pulled back in a half pony tail, her bangs barrel rolled to perfection. Her clothes, her backpack, her shoes…everything about her was perfect. Except her personality. She was a bully. Often mean and always judgmental, her verbal attacks scratched like the claws of a tiny kitten. Even the tiniest of punctures could sting for days.
“Oh yeah?,” I snarled back. “My mom said that some people may be pretty on the outside, but they can be ugly on the inside. YOU’RE UGLY ON THE INSIDE!,” I screamed at her. Shocked, she stared at me with her mouth slightly parted, her bottom lip just starting to tremble. Then, she remembered who she was. She was top dog. She was queen bee. She wasn’t going to put up with some geeky bottom-of-the-totem-pole girl standing up to her. She furrowed her brows, took a step forward, and venomously whispered through pursed lips those two words no kindergartner ever wants to hear, “I’m…..telling.”
Ice water spread through my veins while my feet melded to the floor. Could she? Would she? Oh yes. Yes, she would.
Sweetly, she approached the teacher, and announced to the entire class, “Mrs. Farmer, Catherine called me ugly.” She looked back at me over her shoulder, a twinkle in her eye. “No…,” I stammered. “I called her ugly on the inside.” But I knew my fate was sealed. “Catherine, you go sit in the corner!,” the teacher scolded me, pointing a manicured finger into the dark shadows of the classroom.
I shuffled to the blue plastic chair in the corner, my white scuffed-up high tops squeaking on the speckled tile floor. I slumped into the chair, head hung low. My small hands traced the edge of the nubby gray dog on my maroon poodle skirt, wondering for the first time why exactly I was dressed this way. Was this why she picked on me? Because I wore strange clothes? Or was it because I was a know-it-all who had to answer every question first? Or was it because I challenged her authority? No, she didn’t need a reason. She was just a bully. And I was just a girl who stood up for myself, and was forced to sit down in the corner. Still, I have no regrets.
What a nasty, mean girl! I’m glad that you stood up to her and that you have no regrets. I just wanna deck her…
Ha! I’m sure I did, too. Glad I refrained from that much retaliation. 😉
Oh, you picked the perfect image for this post. That mean, ol’ Nelly Olsen. I hated her so.
Sometimes getting in trouble is worth it, especially when it comes to dealing with bullies.
I really enjoyed this post and your writing.
Oh, thank you. You’re right, getting in trouble is well worth it sometimes. 🙂
I love it that you put Nellie Olson in this post, how fitting! I bet she got her comeuppance!
Yes, Nellie was a perfect fit. Nobody can scowl quite like her. Well, except that kindergarten bully.
Good for you! She’s a jerk.
😉 That’s all I can say about that.
ohh that mean nellie! You tell her! Poor, sweet little you in the skirt! Good for you.
I’m not sure I was a sweet girl, but I think we were poor. 😉
I am just copying and pasting this first part. Sorry … I promise you will only have to endure it once. I’m Angela — new to blogging and new to yeah write. But, not new to writing. Until becoming unemployed this June (effin’ Scott Walker … oops!), I taught high school English and Creative Writing was one of those courses. So, long story short: I will always have lots to say. Feel free to curse at me if you don’t want to hear all my feedback. If you want more, let me know that too. I will glady offer even further feedback, but I’m not interested in pissing anyone off my first time on the grid. Now, on to your post …
I totally agree you picked the perfect picture for this post. The story is brilliantly told, and will resonate with so many people. I think we’ve all known a snotty little brat like this — those awful kids who think they are better than you. You are better than them — definitely better than them! I really enjoyed reading this — stellar imagery.
Oh, thank you for your feedback! I really appreciate it. And I’m sorry to hear about your unemployment. It must be a scary time for you. As far as the Facebook social plugin, it’s just a free widget I downloaded. But I see you’re using Blogspot. I’m not familiar with that interface.
And … your page is beautiful. I know nothing about page design. How do you properly do a facebook social plug-in?
I hated the mean, nasty Nellie. Even as an adult I can’t find it in me to have any compassion for that girl. Loved your story. Hated that this is what happened to you in kinder, but loved how you told the story. As a school counselor, I felt like I was at work, watching this scene play out (I even have the characters picked out in my head). I’d like to think that the teacher’s response wouldn’t happen nowadays but, unfortunately, there are still kids who are told to sit in the corner for standing up.
Thank you for your kind words. It was actually kind of fun retelling this story, and it makes me glad I had such “rich” experiences as a child. 🙂
oh wow you couldn’t have picked a more perfect photo to represent this piece!!! good for you for standing up for yourself!
Good for you for standing up to your own Nellie Oleson. My grandmother used to say, “Don’t act ugly,” her version of “ugly on the inside.” Wonderful piece, very evocative for many I’m sure.
Evocative. Now I like the sound of that. 🙂 Thank you for dropping by and sharing the piece!
I love the way this was told. You captured it all perfectly. From the standing up for yourself, to the feeling of fear that you were going to get in trouble, to wondering why, to the unfairness of it all.
Contemplating mean girls must be going around. I just posted about my bully getting the ultimate smack by karma. It pays to stay true and kind, and to hold your head high. Ellen
Thank you Ellen! And I need to go read your post. 🙂
Ugly on the inside is right! I love that everyone has been told a version of that when they were growing up. In my neighborhood it was a quick slap and a “don’t act ugly. God don’t like ugly.”
Bullys suck. I’m glad you came out of it okay although I disagree with you being sent to the corner! Poor you.
I might just steal your phrase…:-)
You just brought back so many memories of my best-frenemy from K-8th grade. This sounds exactly like a fight she and I would have had. I was always the one getting in trouble because I always had to have the last word and she always told on me.
Great story – sorry you had a bully. They are no fun.
So…are you still frenemies? 😉
No one puts Cat in the corner!! I can’t imagine this being more beautifully written. I loved the phrasing, details and flowy-ness of your words (I doubt that’s a word, but it describes the feeling I had reading your story). I’m not sure why but I’m more annoyed with your teacher sticking you in the corner. Bitch! I had an fabulous image of you in my head at the end smiling to yourself because you realized “Nellie” would never let anyone get close enough to her to be a true friend.
I think flowy-ness is an awesome word. 😉 And thanks for making me laugh.
Ugh, I hate the mean girls. And it always worries me when the kids who stand up for themselves get punished and the ones who cause the trouble don’t. I’m not sure exactly what lesson that is teaching, but I’m pretty sure it’s nothing good.
You know, it wasn’t a bad lesson. Because it often seems that in life, the “bullies” can show up and may not ever get in trouble. But the right thing is the right thing, no matter if anyone recognizes it!
I always thought sweet Laura was much prettier than Nellie anyway. Good for you, standing up for yourself!
Yes, it was hard to see Nellie’s beauty with that scowl!
My Mom just reminded me again this morning that when I was little she always thought I was ugly on the inside. I was not a bully, I know that. 49 yrs old and I wonder why I keep people at arms length!! What is wrong with my Mom that she feels the need to say that to me?