Life is tough in the shadows. A little sister speaks out.

Sup? What, you didn’t know I could talk, let alone type? Well, I can. I can do a lot of things. But you wouldn’t know, would you? It’s always “my preschooler this,” and “my older daughter that.” Like the time she danced and people laughed. Woop-di-freakin-do! I could totally take her in a dance off. Anyways, it’s time you know the truth. I’m tired of living in the shadows. Tired of only being the subject of maybe 20% of my mom’s blog posts. That’s right. I exist. Maybe you didn’t even know that. Sure, my mom may have mentioned she has two daughters, but why doesn’t she ever talk about me? It’s always about her. My older sister. Like she’s all that and a bag of powdered donuts.

I can do cool things, too, you know. I can say things like “poop” and “color,” and “cracker.” Oh yeah, I can also say “sorry.” Why did I have to learn how to say that? Because my mom actually makes me apologize to my big sister. Can you believe that? After sixteen months of hair-pulling, “accidental” pushing and try-to-choke-me-out hugging I’ve put up with, my mom tries to discipline me when I fight back. It’s called retribution, mom. Just let us work it out. I mean, what would you do if you had to put up with this?

And this?

Or this?

And worst of all, this?

Would you just play nice? Or would you fight back? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

I’ve got other skills, too. Like throwing things away. Sure, sometimes I throw away things I’m not supposed to, like the remote or mom’s camera. But hey, I’m a baby! I’m still learning. And if you think that’s cool, you should see me flush the toilet. I can do it over and over again, usually 2 or 3 times before my mom stops me. I’m quick like that. Big sister can’t match my flushing skills. She’s tried.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my big sister. But I deserve a little attention, too. After all, I am fabulous in my own right. I’ll just bide my time and wait. That spotlight will be mine!